The beauty in correcting our own mistakes; rather than attempting to correct the mistakes in others, is that working upon our own flaws improves us. In this edition of By Your Life, we’ll see how this philosophy is not only a good principle for moral dilemmas, but it improves our effectiveness at work and in life.

Mass Readings Audio
http://ccc.usccb.org/cccradio/NABPodcasts/2019/19_03_03.mp3

Eighth Sunday in Ordinary Time – March 3, 2019

Welcome to the forty-ninth episode of By Your Life. Thank you for joining me. If you haven’t already, please subscribe via iTunes, Stitcher, or on the right side of this page so I can send you notifications when each new episode is posted. And please forward to a friend you think would benefit from By Your Life.

My goal is to inspire, empower, support, challenge, and encourage you to connect Sunday, with Monday-Friday, in a secular, business world. It is my desire to help you live our Catholic faith in the marketplace and to trust that it is good for business. I hope to offer you practical ways to go forth and glorify the Lord by your life.

As I reflected on the readings for the Eighth Sunday in Ordinary Time, I couldn’t help but be reminded of some comments I’ve seen on social media posts. You know, the vile, accusing, and even damning comments people self-righteously post condemning others of this or that. There was one post recently with a picture of a young woman. It was her mug shot. She had been arrested for abusing her child and causing his death. This was a horrific crime, no doubt. But almost as horrific were the comments from people expressing what should be done to her. They spewed hate-filled words demanding punishment and that she be treated the same way she had treated her son. Think about that for a minute. What she did to her son was appalling, yet people were advocating the same horrible behavior in response.

In the Gospel, Luke tells us that Jesus told them a parable. To know who “they” were that Jesus was talking to, we must go back a few Sundays to the Sermon on the Plains. Jesus was speaking to “a great crowd of his disciples and a large number of the people from all Judea and Jerusalem and the coastal region of Tyre and Sidon.” (Lk 6:17) In other words, he was talking to just about everyone from every walk of life, including us. This is important because when Jesus told a parable, it was a specific kind of story that personally criticized the person to whom the parable was told, to raise that person’s consciousness to a new level of understanding, and to call that person to conversion and reform.

So, here we are, the people to whom the parable is told, being criticized and called to conversion and reform. Jesus asks us, “Can a blind person guide a blind person?” (Lk 6:39) Which one are you? Are you the blind guide? Or, are you the one who has allowed yourself to be led astray? Or both?

We know that social media is a playground for the blind leading the blind. I read some of these posts to learn about human behavior and to understand other people’s perspectives, but I don’t recommend it. If you do not guard yourself, you will be letting the blind lead you right into a pit.

But what about at work? Who is guiding you? Jesus said, “When fully trained, every disciple will be like his teacher.” (Lk 6:40) Are you in an environment where you are surrounded by people you want to emulate? Before we answer this, let’s back up for a minute to the first reading from the Book of Sirach, and to the three verses before the reading we heard at Mass. It says:

For the sake of profit many sin, and the struggle for wealth blinds the eyes. …Unless one holds fast to the fear of the Lord, with sudden swiftness will one’s house be thrown down. (Sir 27:1, 3)

We all know of many examples of those who have sinned because of the pursuit of wealth: PG&E, Volkswagen, Wells Fargo, Big Pharma, politicians, and others. If you pull up the Securities and Exchange Commission press releases on their website, you’ll find, among other things, people charged with Ponzi schemes just within the last two months. Didn’t we learn our lesson from Bernie Madoff? In a Ponzi scheme, the perpetrator, or the greed-blinded guide, deceives wealth-blinded prospect with too-good-to-be-true returns. And they are too good to be true, that’s why Ponzi schemes implode and with sudden swiftness, it all comes tumbling down.

So maybe these sensational stories that make the headlines and the crimes committed are more egregious than most business transactions that occur every day. But that doesn’t mean we too aren’t guilty of pursuing wealth and sinning for the sake of profit. Have you ever withheld the whole truth so as not to jeopardize a deal going through? Have you ever padded an expense report, exaggerated on your résumé, or kept the change when the cashier made a mistake in your favor?

I was facilitating a group discussion about behaving with integrity and a woman in the group shared a story about how she had purchased two items but because they were stacked together, the clerk accidentally only rang up one. As she was leaving the store, the woman did some mental arithmetic and realized the mistake. When she looked at her receipt, she confirmed that she, in fact, had been undercharged. So, she went back into the store and told the clerk what had happened. However, the clerk now had several people in her lane and so she told the woman that she had to go to the end of the line. Deciding that that was too much of a hassle, the woman left with her two items. She told the group “I tried to do the right thing, but they wouldn’t let me.”

What do you think?

Beware of pointing to other people’s wrong behavior as a justification for your own. When that is your only defense, you’re pointing to the splinter in the other person’s eye when you’ve got a wooden beam in your own.

Jesus’ teaching is just as applicable in situations that aren’t moral dilemmas, but rather simply being effective and getting the job done. When I’m working with my coaching clients, it is not uncommon for them to vent about how someone else failed them in some way or otherwise was a thorn in their side. They will repeatedly point out how the other person was preventing them from succeeding in one way or another. These clients usually have valid complaints, and whether it was big or small, what the other person did, or failed to do, caused problems. But when I’m coaching, it is meant for the person in the room, and no one else. My usual response is to acknowledge the issue and then say, “He is who he is (or she is who she is), so what can you do about it?”

The beauty in correcting our own mistakes; rather than attempting to correct the mistakes in others, is that working upon our own flaws improves us. ~ Unknown

For example, recently, I was talking with a client about a deliverable he hadn’t made much progress on. He said that he had sent two emails to people and hadn’t gotten any response. He was willing to just let that be the end of the story. So, I persisted, reminding him that the purpose of any form of communication is to elicit some form of behavioral response or action. Obviously, his communication was ineffective.

He had two choices. The first was to blame the others for not responding and not complete his deliverable. Or, he could step back and ask, “How should I have communicated with these people?” Was email the best medium? Was my request clear, urgent, and did it inspire a response?

My client agreed that instead of laying blame on those who failed to reply to his request, perhaps he needed to see what he should have done differently, like picking up the phone or changing how he asked, in order to get the response he needed. He also admitted that he too was guilty of letting emails slip and not responding in a timely manner, if at all.

And this is just as important. As Publilius Syrus, the Latin writer born almost a century before Christ said, “From the errors of others, a wise man corrects his own.”

Taking personal responsibility doesn’t mean that the other person is without fault, and I don’t believe Jesus was prohibiting us from recognizing the faults of others. Rather, we shouldn’t pass judgment in a spirit of arrogance, forgetful of our own faults. Let’s not forget the message from last Sunday’s Gospel. “Stop judging and you will not be judged. Stop condemning and you will not be condemned. Forgive and you will be forgiven.” (Lk 6:37)

How effective can you possibly be when you correct someone if you are judgmental? Versus, how much more effective will you be when you acknowledge that you too have probably made a similar mistake? When you condemn, you trigger a natural reaction in the other person, and they become defensive. When that happens, they aren’t learning anything. Instead, their brain is reacting with “fight, flight, or freeze.” Listen again to what Jesus asked, “Can a blind person guide a blind person?” (Lk 6:39) Don’t be a blind guide. Its not good for either of you.

I’d like to end with the last verses of the Gospel. Jesus said, “A good tree does not bear rotten fruit, nor does a rotten tree bear good fruit… For every tree is known by its own fruit. A good person out of the store of goodness in his heart produces good.” (Lk 6:43, 45)

I recently attempted to plant a few cuttings from an Angel Trumpet tree. I put them in two large pots and since I wasn’t sure what part of my yard was the best environment, I put one in the front and the other in the back. One thrived, has grown 4-5 feet tall, and produced its first blossoms a few weeks ago. The other barely grew to two feet and there is no sign of a bloom. These two plants were cuttings from the same tree, are in the same sized pots, the same soil, and were watered equally. The only difference is the amount of light they received.

Does your tree get enough Light? If you’re struggling this week, lay your problems in the Light so that you can see more clearly. Let Him be your guide. The Light of the World came to dispel darkness so that we can thrive and produce good.

Let us ask the Holy Spirit to shed the Light of Truth to help us to see ourselves clearly so that we can also help others to do the same.

Come Holy Spirit, fill the hearts of your faithful, and kindle in them, the fire of your love. Send forth your Spirit, and they shall be created, and you shall renew the face of the earth.

May God bless you abundantly this week and may you glorify the Lord by your life. Amen.

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